Ep. 38: Tim Shurr on The 5 Step Strategy to Getting Mentally Unstuck
In this episode, David sits down with Tim Shurr, Award Winning Speaker, Author, Psychologist, and Multi-Award Winning Hypnotist, to discuss the five step strategy to getting mentally unstuck.
Buy David’s NEW Book: https://www.trustedleaderbook.com/
Tim Shurr has advanced degrees in Psychology and is a Multi-Award Winning Hypnotist. He facilitated over 15,000 individual coaching sessions and hundreds of group training experiences over the last 32 years and discovered how to quickly eliminate anxiety and self-sabotage while skyrocketing productivity and leadership impact. As an award-winning Leadership Speaker, Tim has helped Corporate Clients earn millions in annual revenue using the One Belief Away Method from his book, One Belief Away! Tim’s approach is so effective, he’s been featured on ABC, NBC, CBS, FOX News, and the TEDx stage. He’s also the founder of the Legend Summit and host of the popular, How To Be Mesmerizing podcast.
“One Belief Away!” by Tim Shurr: https://amzn.to/3k1rVjV
Tim’s FREE program “The Power Of Your Unconscious Mind”: http://powermindsetprogram.com
1. “Your biggest breakthroughs are often hidden in the places you don’t want to go.”
2. “Learning how to train your brain is a very powerful and useful skill to possess.”
3. “What’s got us here won’t get us there.”
4. “Our beliefs create our feelings. And then our feelings determine how we behave.”
5. “What would you rather believe instead?”
6. “Pay attention to the beliefs that you have.”
7. “What you think about comes about.”
8. “A belief is just an opinion. Its not a fact.”
9. “Find the beliefs and you will find your solutions.”
10. “If we feel safe its amazing what people can accomplish.”
11. “Its not the experiences you go through, its the beliefs that form that influence you.”
12. “If you’re not intentionally feeding your mind this positive energy, then its going to feed off of whatever else is around you.”
13. “Lift people up everywhere you go.”
Links Mentioned In The Episode:
“One Belief Away!” by Tim Shurr: https://amzn.to/3k1rVjV
Tim’s FREE program “The Power Of Your Unconscious Mind”: http://powermindsetprogram.com
“Get Out of Your Way!” by Tim Shurr: https://amzn.to/3k3qlhs
“The Psychology of Winning” by Dennis Waitley: https://amzn.to/3hS5qv0
“Trusted Leader” by David Horsager: https://www.trustedleaderbook.com/
“The Trust Edge” by David Horsager: https://amzn.to/3e4mWeu
Buy David’s NEW book Trusted Leader: https://www.trustedleaderbook.com/
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David Horsager: Welcome to the trusted leader show it’s David horse soccer i’ve got a special guest today he’s been on ABC NBC every all over the place he’s done 10,000 independent coaching sessions with executives.
David Horsager: He has written several books his newest and co and co written several books but.
David Horsager: One of them, I want to touch on today is one belief away we’re going to talk about that we’re going to talk about some specific things want you know he’s got a five step strategy for getting unstuck and there’s a whole lot more we didn’t say but welcome TIM sure.
Tim Shurr: David it is such an honor and a treat to be with you today.
David Horsager: Well, thank you for just being a part of our trusted leader show and our trusted leader audience and I think we’ve got some great things in store today before we get right into it, which we like to do, maybe a couple more things just about you.
Tim Shurr: Yes, so I think the one thing that allows me to stand out is that i’ve been a hypnotist for the last 30 years, and so I started out.
Tim Shurr: trying to figure out how to get rid of anxiety, how to get rid of the worries and the stress and the self sabotage or the imposter syndrome, or those.
Tim Shurr: You know I wanted to be a top performer I wanted to excel I wanted to make the world a better place, but on the flip side of that is all that internal pressure self doubt insecurity that we all experience from time to time.
Tim Shurr: And I wanted to figure out how do you shift that, how do you get out of your own way, and so I went to school for psychology but I found that talk therapy was very slow.
Tim Shurr: You could sometimes go to school for go to a counselor for 10 years and not feel any better.
Tim Shurr: And so I happened to stumble upon a hypnotist to hypnotize me one time and I felt this sense of peace and calm almost immediately and I got really interested on what it was.
Tim Shurr: I was skeptical at first, but open minded, thank goodness, because your biggest breakthroughs are often hidden in the places you don’t want to go.
Tim Shurr: And, and then I found that hypnosis was an incredible tool to unlock the power of your unconscious mind.
Tim Shurr: And so it’s been three decades now, and I actually have facilitated 15,000 individual hypnosis sessions over this period and it helped me to unlock the secrets of our mind and i’m here to share some of those secrets with you today.
David Horsager: there’s a lot of people skeptical like Oh, we shouldn’t open up, especially those that are you know, maybe you know.
David Horsager: have faith that would say ooh don’t open your mind to this kind of thing or that someone else controlling things, what do you say to that.
Tim Shurr: Why, I say that you’re correct, you should just allow yourself to be open to somebody who might have poor intentions right, however, I also believe that.
Tim Shurr: learning how to train your brain is a very powerful and useful skill to possess it’s what emotional intelligence is all about if religion is involved, the biggest thing that the devil ever did was get people not to use hypnosis.
Tim Shurr: any of you guys, it is it doesn’t want you learning how to tap into these God given tools that we have because really Hollywood makes hypnosis look like you can.
Tim Shurr: put people in trances and make them do whatever but that’s not what it is, or I wouldn’t be doing that right so.
Tim Shurr: it’s really about understanding how your beliefs, that you develop when you’re a kid are still driving your behavior as an adult today.
Tim Shurr: it’s influencing your money your marriage your health your priorities those beliefs, that we developed when we were eight year old kids.
Tim Shurr: And hypnosis gives you access to those beliefs, so that you can upgrade them so it’s practical it’s loving it’s empowering and it’s the fastest way to create change.
David Horsager: Well, you know i’ve got so many questions for you.
David Horsager: I don’t even know where to start I guess i’ll go my original way here to kind of give overall overview, but I want to come back to personal like we talked about.
David Horsager: Before this of you know kids that went through this pandemic time frame and avoided, and all that kind of stuff because I think.
David Horsager: there’s a lot of people, a lot of leaders that you know, think of things they want to do to shift their mindset or be able to deal with you know.
David Horsager: Challenges they’re facing, but I think we all have kids to that are our challenge or kind of avoiding you know key issues today.
David Horsager: let’s let’s jump in here to this one belief away book and you said something about how you know.
David Horsager: entrepreneurs and business leaders they get stuck they get stressed to get overwhelmed they struggle to make big breakthroughs and they’re often in you’re not solving the right problems, in fact, they often have mental malware malware tell us about it.
Tim Shurr: So we all have had computers, where we accidentally downloaded some kind of virus and now all of a sudden, our emails not working.
Tim Shurr: Right and we could have the best computer, but if we download that virus then it’s not going to allow those programs to run optimally.
Tim Shurr: Well, human beings have an operating system as well, and we also download malware I call it mental malware and those are beliefs like i’m not good enough, I have to be a perfectionist.
Tim Shurr: You can’t trust people right all kinds of beliefs that cause us to feel like we’re not enough or you can’t trust others.
Tim Shurr: And those beliefs, usually are what sabotage leaders, which is why you and I both talked so much about trust, but if you don’t upgrade those beliefs, that are causing you to not to trust yourself or others you can’t get there right and so yeah.
David Horsager: And so, how do you do that it’s like man changing a belief like you’ve had this belief, since childhood, or you i’ve had this belief, since whatever and i’m like I can’t even be aware, I, like you know for me it’s like oh.
David Horsager: I want to be more patient, I mean some of the driven, this is what helped us, you know change change lives change people, but sometimes I don’t like me pull back here, you know it’s it’s like.
David Horsager: Lord help me be patient and help me be patient right now, you know it’s like let’s just say that’s that’s when like Oh, how do I, how do I actually change a belief that i’m there i’m stuck in it, I know what even I might even be aware of it yeah.
Tim Shurr: Well it’s it’s easy to do, let me unpack this for you real quick with that very example you just gave.
Tim Shurr: So your brain is always trying to avoid pain and gain pleasure it’s built into us and we will want to avoid pain, more than anything else, so one of the things that you just said, David was that.
Tim Shurr: You know I might want to be patient, however, that energy is also what made me successful.
Tim Shurr: And after working with a lot of high powered CEOs and C suite execs I found that a lot of times we don’t want to give up that impatience or that drive because we think it’s our mojo.
Tim Shurr: And if we give it up we’re going to somehow lose what allowed us to become successful.
Tim Shurr: Which is not the case it’s actually just an evolution, because you and I both know that what God is here won’t get us there right so we’ve got to evolve.
Tim Shurr: But it’s hard to do that if you won’t upgrade a belief, because you think that it’s somehow still serving you.
Tim Shurr: So we go either you know black or white it’s got to be this way or that i’m patient or i’m not patient but there’s always options see you know the third option, where we have that new way of.
Tim Shurr: of having a belief, where i’m patient because I want to be open to the feedback of others, and I want to be kind, and I want to build trust.
Tim Shurr: And you do that by being patient and sometimes taking a breath and slowing down.
Tim Shurr: Like if you’re on ice I live in the Midwest when it snows it gets icy outside that’s not the time to slam on the acceleration pedal.
Tim Shurr: right because you’re you’re burning your wheels you but you ain’t going anywhere it’s time to take the foot off the gas and slow things down.
Tim Shurr: Well, we can do both there’s a time to engage and accelerate and then there’s a time to take your foot off the pedal so we just want to evolve our beliefs and get clear, so that your brain, it will not release a belief if it thinks it’s protecting you.
Tim Shurr: Or if it thinks it’s serving you in some positive way and if you can get clarity around that like if you have a belief that you can’t trust people.
Tim Shurr: You and I both know that is not you might say, yeah well, it keeps you from getting hurt.
Tim Shurr: But it also keeps you from building the relationships that you will need to be able to take your results to the next level.
Tim Shurr: And so that’s why the conflict comes in, where people have a hard time letting go of the old beliefs it’s because it’s still serving them and what we would do is shift that around.
David Horsager: How long does it take to shift a belief.
Tim Shurr: A couple of minutes.
Tim Shurr: wow yeah people, people and it stays shifted like once you understand that the world is round not flat, you know, and you have that experience you can’t go back to thinking, the world’s flat anymore.
Tim Shurr: Right now, it just doesn’t you just don’t believe that anymore right and so.
Tim Shurr: yeah so people think that oh you got to do all this work and it takes 21 days and it takes years to change beliefs that’s not been my experience.
Tim Shurr: And I was in the trenches doing 60 sessions a week for decades, you know, working with every kind of person there was with every kind of you know whether we’re growing your company or i’m getting people off cocaine and heroin and.
Tim Shurr: You know, as a psychologist.
Tim Shurr: As a psychologist yeah all that yeah well yeah so I have my master’s degree in psychology and I was working towards my doctorate but I found that tools like hypnotism neuro linguistic programming.
Tim Shurr: The peak performance tools that we’re helping people with post traumatic stress, which is what I was most interested in in the beginning.
Tim Shurr: I wasn’t really interested in helping people to grow companies or how do you get people to get along after a merger, I mean I wasn’t that wasn’t my forte and I was a kid that grew up in Cornfields I didn’t care about what you’re doing so yeah That was my evolution.
Tim Shurr: As I had more.
Tim Shurr: You know CEOs coming to see me for a variety of problems and they’re like hey you think you could hypnotize my sales team to close more sales.
Tim Shurr: And i’m like okay right but that wasn’t my forte so in the beginning it was helping people with anxiety post traumatic stress I worked with a ton of veterans and.
Tim Shurr: I was the guy that you went to when nothing else worked right, I was the last resort hypnotist you know that people went to, and then we got amazing results and so.
Tim Shurr: Those tools were what I went for and and I found that they weren’t just so much faster and better than cognitive behavioral therapy.
Tim Shurr: And he said this desensitization so I probably went into that a little bit farther.
David Horsager: was great.
Tim Shurr: tell you.
David Horsager: You know I want to get an example, some time but let’s first step into the five step strategy for getting unstuck This is something we can talk about right now, yes plenty of people are feel stuck whether it’s in.
David Horsager: Their work or business or the leaders we’re talking to today, or maybe in their marriage or family or life right so.
David Horsager: Can you give us a little hint on this, I know we’d like to read, no more we’re going to put everything.
David Horsager: In the snow snow notes, here we go Minnesota word in the show notes TIM sure calm and all the places, you can find everything about TIM his books, even if you want to.
David Horsager: connect with them in deeper ways have them come speak to your group, but let’s um let’s just jump into an overview of this five step strategy and get get some value right now.
Tim Shurr: yeah so start with the feeling right So what are you feeling, you know, instead of what are you thinking, what are you feeling in are you feeling.
Tim Shurr: Stress pressure overwhelm uncertainty, you know it’s usually a negative emotion that people are wanting to change when they’re feeling stuck or you procrastinating.
Tim Shurr: What is it that you’re feeling, then I want you to ask yourself what would, I have to believe to feel this way.
Tim Shurr: Because our beliefs, create our feelings and then our feelings determine how we behave So if you start with the feeling, and then you say all right well i’m feeling this stress, right now, this pressure, what would, I have to believe in order to feel this way.
Tim Shurr: Well i’d have to believe I guess that maybe it’s not going to work out or we don’t have the power to be able to you know the resources to be able to figure this out or there’s too much uncertainty.
Tim Shurr: So when the pandemic broke out David I started doing programs for fire chiefs around the country because I was already doing their conventions and.
Tim Shurr: Teaching leadership skills for fire chiefs the soft skills and and they really needed it in this time of uncertainty.
Tim Shurr: And a lot of Chiefs were overwhelmed because they were afraid they weren’t going to have the supplies the mass what they needed to be able to take care of everybody, and they were really stressed out.
Tim Shurr: And so you know the belief was that we’re not going to be able to handle it, you know something bad is going to happen so, then what we ask ourselves is what would you want to believe, instead, what would you rather believe instead.
Tim Shurr: And that simple, you know shift from focusing on what we’re afraid of to focusing on what we want to have happen.
Tim Shurr: causes your brain to pay attention to a completely different set of information that’s in your awareness that you might not be paying attention to.
Tim Shurr: Because you have infinite potential you could make so many decisions right now in this moment.
Tim Shurr: You can keep listening to the podcast you go to the bathroom you get something to eat, you could talk to a friend, you could get on a plane and go to Vegas you have so many things that you could do.
Tim Shurr: But your brain doesn’t pay attention to all of that it pays attention to whatever your belief is and then it causes you to.
Tim Shurr: Look, for evidence that supports that particular belief, which is why it’s so important to pay attention to the beliefs, that you have which hardly anybody ever does that.
Tim Shurr: Because we’re relying on our logical analytical mind we’re not paying attention to our unconscious mind which actually controls 80% of what we do.
Tim Shurr: Right and so those beliefs are like programs that are running in our mind and they cause us to focus on what we.
Tim Shurr: What we expect to have happen so if we’re having a fear that we’re overwhelmed and we’re not going to be able to work it out that our brain is finding all these reasons for why it’s not going to work out and what you focus on expands.
Tim Shurr: What you think about comes about, whatever you focus on most of the time, your life becomes.
Tim Shurr: So when you shift from what i’m really afraid of is that it’s not going to work out or I can’t trust it my people are going to work it out, or maybe i’m not sure.
Tim Shurr: what’s going to happen and i’m not sure what to do and that’s the bigger fear is, then, if I don’t look like i’m in control what are people going to think of me.
Tim Shurr: Am I going to lose my credibility are people going to start to miss trust me are people going to feel like maybe i’m not the right person for the job and i’m going to lose my job.
Tim Shurr: Right and if I lost my job, what would happen, then you know how am I going to pay the bills how am I gonna you know where would I find another job.
Tim Shurr: And a lot of times we start digging deep in the middle of the night is usually in the middle of night when we start having these worries and fears, you know all the what IFS.
Tim Shurr: And so, when you ask yourself all right, what would I rather have happen, what would I want to believe in this situation if you can believe anything, because a belief is just an opinion.
Tim Shurr: it’s not a fact so well i’d want to believe that it’s going to work out, I want to believe that.
Tim Shurr: Our people are going to rally that we’re going to find a solution that we’re going to figure out a way that i’m going to be able to rise to the occasion.
Tim Shurr: That i’m going to end up stronger and wiser and more effective and people believe in me even more and i’m going to believe in myself even more because of this situation it’s just an opportunity.
Tim Shurr: to grow and become more effective well if that’s what you’re focusing on then, all of a sudden, you start to feel more confident more secure.
Tim Shurr: Okay, and then, of course, then you would ask yourself step, four and five would be all right.
Tim Shurr: Well, if I was feeling this new feeling of confidence and there was a new opportunity because i’m thinking in a new way what would be a big step that I would make what would be a bold move that I would take.
Tim Shurr: what’s a big domino move where you push down one domino and and knocks all the other ones down by might have that conversation that difficult conversation I might call that customer up.
Tim Shurr: I might sit down and have that talk or have that apology or get together with different department heads and have just a creativity session, you know it would be a big.
Tim Shurr: move that I could make that would create some momentum, or you know get some things cleared out instead of swept under the carpet once you get clear on what your big move would be then step five is act on it put it into action.
Tim Shurr: And that process, you can go through it in a matter of minutes right but you’re, starting with the feeling.
Tim Shurr: what’s the fear that i’m having what would, I have to believe in order to have that fear, what would I rather believe, instead, which is number three.
Tim Shurr: Number four is what’s a big bold move that I would make, with this new belief in mind and then number five take action on that big bold new action.
David Horsager: So I, this is very interesting, I can hear some people saying wow that seems tremendous I could do that with myself, but what you when you said.
David Horsager: your team like you know I know some people would say, are a big problem for leaders they don’t confront the brutal facts like that person is failing they aren’t dealing with in your.
David Horsager: In it, in that one situation with others when I trust others I trust them for what they do consistently right if they’re late all the time, it would be kind of crazy to.
David Horsager: Trust that they’re also going to be on time, it would be like that’s that doesn’t make sense right so let’s say i’ve got this person outside of me.
David Horsager: I want to believe in them to you know do this new thing I so want that, for them, I hope it for them, but my my you know mind would say that’s not been my experience that would be stupid to believe that So how do I get that you know I want a number three.
David Horsager: What would I want to believe i’d want to believe that they’re going to succeed they’re going to do this, but I do have this skepticism and that because it just hasn’t made sense in any experience i’ve had so you know how do I do that.
Tim Shurr: Excellent outstanding question so alright, so in that situation, the first thing we did was fully focused on what we can do.
Tim Shurr: Instead of what we want others to do we focused on what can I do so I can be the cause, instead of the effect right what instead of what’s going to happen, what can I bring to the situation.
Tim Shurr: Then in that specific example, David what we would do is, if you feel like somebody is slipping what we do is, we have a conversation with them and we try to figure out what their belief is that’s driving that behavior.
Tim Shurr: If you become someone who is always looking for beliefs, you will find them and those beliefs are what’s driving everything.
Tim Shurr: If somebody is always late they might have a belief that they need to get a couple more things in before they get to the office and it always throws them off.
Tim Shurr: off right or maybe they have a belief that they’re dropping the ball now.
Tim Shurr: And because they’re dropping the ball they feel all this internal pressure, all this stress, which is wearing them out.
Tim Shurr: causing them to drink at night, causing them to not sleep good, then they wake up tired and then they’ve been doing this for months, so now they’re all wore out and they’re just Dreading that for that phone call that you’re fired.
Tim Shurr: And that kind of fear, usually causes people to shut down instead of step up, but if you are able to recognize it that was going on.
Tim Shurr: You could help upgrade that belief and give them a new sense of energy create some collaborative partners with them to help them succeed and believe in them and that builds trust, and it also.
Tim Shurr: helps you to be able to get to the root of the issue, instead of trying to deal with the symptoms that are happening like procrastination or showing up late and things like that those are symptoms so find the beliefs, and you will find your solutions.
David Horsager: that’s that’s the takeaway find your beliefs, and you will find your solutions.
David Horsager: let’s jump to that’s a five step strategy for getting unstuck.
David Horsager: And it seems like that might overlap with what I was going to ask before with let’s say you know kid in the pandemic that didn’t do their homework that’s a good performer but that avoided it or you know.
David Horsager: Many people listening are parents of children that maybe their their child isn’t doing exactly what they hope for and they see it taking them down the wrong path anything you would add to that situation.
Tim Shurr: yeah again a lot of times we don’t know how to make ourselves feel safe.
Tim Shurr: And so, one of the ways that you can help people to feel safe is to help them do a two step process where you use power breathing and you ask a power question to power breathing is when you take.
Tim Shurr: You breathe, through your nose you breathe down to your belly, then you slowly exhale you do that five times in a row, it takes less than a minute.
Tim Shurr: But you’re just literally just sitting there and breathing through your nose, most of us under pressure breathe through our mouth, which actually makes us feel more stressed inside so breathing through your nose.
Tim Shurr: And then slowly exhaling it causes us to slow down, and when you do that five times in a row it activates your brains relaxation response so you actually get a little hit of dopamine.
Tim Shurr: And it makes you feel better so you got built in antidepressants in your brain already you don’t have to take anything you just.
Tim Shurr: Use your power breathing once you slow down, then you focus on asking a power question, what is the outcome that I want what resources do I have who can I lean on for support.
Tim Shurr: How do I want to feel right now what’s one way, I could feel that way that would make me feel good about myself afterwards, like I could go eat a bunch of junk food, but then I won’t feel good afterwards.
Tim Shurr: But I could you know, take a walk listened to a motivating video on YouTube you know and then all of a sudden, I start to believe in myself and feel like this is possible, and then it shifts how you feel and it shifts what you focus on so usually just giving people resources helps tremendously.
David Horsager: Are those power questions in one of your books or do you have a handout we can throw in here on with them.
Tim Shurr: yeah i’ll send you a handout that you can with samples of power questions so i’ll get you that and then, yes, these are in my book, the one belief away, and also the get out of your way books have those power questions.
David Horsager: Get out of your way but we’ll put all these in the show notes trusted leader show dot com.
Tim Shurr: Okay, tell you one of the fastest ways though really that I take people through isn’t really just asking them questions because that can shift pretty quickly.
Tim Shurr: Because you’re using your conscious mind you’re shifting what you’re focusing on which immediately makes you feel more secure.
Tim Shurr: And if we feel safe it’s amazing what people can accomplish it’s amazing what we can get through right so Marcus really is one said that every obstacle in your path is just fuel for your fire.
Tim Shurr: That you go for your fire right, yes, so yeah and so um.
Tim Shurr: But really what I tend to do is I start with that feeling and I have them follow that feeling back to the very first time they ever had that feeling.
Tim Shurr: and almost everybody David goes back to some point when they were a kid when that belief was initially formed.
Tim Shurr: And so that’s why you can upgrade a belief and it’s sustainable, because when I take people through that experience.
Tim Shurr: It shifts how they’re feeling it’s like going back and changing the memory that you have so instead of striking out at the big game, or when you ask someone to go on a date and they said no, or your best friend asked him out.
Tim Shurr: You know behind your back, and you know when we go through those little traumas that we go through, and those beliefs are formed it’s like going back and rewriting the memory.
Tim Shurr: and upgrading the belief it’s not the experiences you go through it’s the beliefs that form that influence you, you know Wayne Dyer used to say that if you get bit by a snake.
Tim Shurr: The snake bite hurts but it’s the venom that’s inside of you that’s what paralyzes you The goal is to get the venom out.
Tim Shurr: And we all have these blind spots these.
Tim Shurr: biases these bad habits that were formed inside of us as a way of surviving when we were young and some of them are very helpful, but some of them are very destructive and it’s.
Tim Shurr: Our goal is to get the poison.
Tim Shurr: out as an adult.
David Horsager: You talked about something you know you call it achiever syndrome yeah what tell me about that.
Tim Shurr: Well, you and I are achievers and everybody that listens to your program is an achiever.
Tim Shurr: Right, we are people who believe we can make the world a better place right and we want to.
Tim Shurr: offer value, and we want to help people, and we want to grow, we want to see how far we can take it, we want to see if we can set these crazy goals and then actually pull them off.
Tim Shurr: and part of that in the beginning, usually comes from a fear of not being good enough or trying to prove ourselves or having a chip on our shoulder because someone told us we couldn’t do something and we’re like oh yeah watch me right.
Tim Shurr: And so, a lot of it in the beginning, it shifts when we’re older, but now we want to do it because we want to add value, but in the beginning, it often started from anxiety right that fear that we’re not going to be able to do it, and so it keeps us working harder and pushing harder and.
Tim Shurr: sacrificing our health or relationships or friends or other activities because we’ve got to work and we got to achieve this goal and we’ve got to make it happen.
Tim Shurr: And sometimes we get to a point where it feels like we’ve built this giant hamster wheel, and although it’s powerful and people admired it now, we feel like we can’t get off of it or everything’s going to fall down around us.
Tim Shurr: Right, and so I call that achiever syndrome, because now.
Tim Shurr: That anxiety that allowed us to be able to perform and achieve goals is the same kind of anxiety that now it doesn’t matter what we achieve and what we accomplish.
Tim Shurr: and never feels like it’s enough and we never feel like we can be content or even take a day off without our mind going 1000 miles an hour.
Tim Shurr: So it’s it’s a new way of being able to evolve, so that, instead of playing not to when we’re learning how to play or.
Tim Shurr: Instead of playing not to lose because that’s often how we start we’re trying not to lose we start to shift to playing to win.
Tim Shurr: And we start to realize that how we win is through helping others win and it’s not so self focused anymore, and you know that’s the whole idea behind your.
Tim Shurr: Trust empire that you’ve brought so much good into the world by teaching people how to trust each other and, of course, the only way, you can do that is by trusting yourself first.
David Horsager: yeah so let’s take someone senior executive they’ve got achiever syndrome here.
David Horsager: they’re dying, I have one.
David Horsager: Senior leader.
David Horsager: head of one of the biggest top 10 companies a big portion of the one of the biggest companies in the world and.
David Horsager: we’re in private in public key as hard as nails he is tough, he is he won’t let anybody in yeah privately.
David Horsager: there’s been some really cool things that have happened, but I still remember when he said, David, I feel I wake up with a pit in my stomach with the weight of this organization on my back.
David Horsager: What What do you do with that what, how do you help them move from there, what would you do.
Tim Shurr: it’s very common when you have a high level position you put on the show yep that’s kind of what we call we put on the show right so hard as nails or you know nothing bothers you it just rolls.
Tim Shurr: off your back.
David Horsager: mm hmm.
Tim Shurr: And then you come home, and you have the divorces and the addictions, and you know all the because human beings aren’t made to have that kind of pressure and that kind unless they snap and they become narcissistic right and and but, most people.
Tim Shurr: It was just set up that way you know either they were raised by a family member that was that way or that’s what they learned growing up, you know from the bottom up.
Tim Shurr: And that’s what they learned and it’s exhausting but we’re afraid to take our emotional Armor off is renee brown would call it we’re afraid to remove that emotional Armor because.
Tim Shurr: that’s how you die and it literally will feel like life or death.
Tim Shurr: You know, and so in that situation, what I do is I take them through the awakening process again I take them through that that feeling of responsibility that feeling of pressure and I track it back and I guarantee he would end up going back to some time in his childhood.
Tim Shurr: Where that.
Tim Shurr: belief of who he had to become to get love formed.
Tim Shurr: hmm and so you know the reason that people just don’t let go of that stuff is because it does feel like life and death, and it literally you don’t talk about love very much not you i’m just in general, business people don’t talk about love very much, but it is what rules human beings.
Tim Shurr: You know our need for that love and attention and if.
Tim Shurr: We don’t feel like we’re going to get it, how do I get it and we develop all kinds of strategies some that make us uber wealthy and successful.
Tim Shurr: But the flip side of that is that pit in your stomach having a hard time getting out of bed feeling, you know, in the middle of the night like, how can I have all of this, and still be unhappy what’s wrong with me.
Tim Shurr: mm hmm and and I can’t let it show, because you know people will take me down as soon as they see any weakness which is true, there will be people that are just waiting.
Tim Shurr: To you know see that crack in the Armor because they’re using a similar strategy to get what they want.
Tim Shurr: So we would go and we would actually make that person even stronger by upgrading their sense of their deep sense of self love and self acceptance.
Tim Shurr: And a feeling of peace, because then they can feel safe without the Armor.
Tim Shurr: Which is a whole new trip and people that are waiting for that Armor when the Armor comes off they don’t know how to handle someone like that, so they go usually after someone else.
Tim Shurr: So it even fends off your enemies, you know just by you, it developing this new sense of self love and self acceptance.
David Horsager: hmm yeah.
Tim Shurr: And i’m able to do that because I spent decades doing that you know, with so many people.
Tim Shurr: With so much emotional Armor.
David Horsager: yeah.
David Horsager: Tell us right here i’ve got a few more questions I got to ask, even though we’re.
David Horsager: we’re we’ve gotten so much already, but before we get to those last couple of questions.
David Horsager: You are you know we’re going to give all of the places to find out about you in the show notes.
David Horsager: Tell us about the free program power, the unconscious mind that you’re giving our listeners today and tell us out loud, also where to find that part of mindset program calm and anywhere else you especially would would allow people to reach out to you.
Tim Shurr: Thank you, David that’s very kind of you, so I created a program called the power of your unconscious mind, because so many people don’t really understand.
Tim Shurr: How their mind works, and so I put together a really fun program that starts off with a lot of cool stories from all the clients experience, as you can imagine, as a hypnotist.
Tim Shurr: All you know 30 years of clients some of the experiences that i’ve had, and so I talked about a lot of those experiences and how powerful.
Tim Shurr: Just everyday normal people are you know, with the power we’re walking around inside of us we just don’t know how to use it it’s kind of like having a big steel safe.
Tim Shurr: And you only know two numbers of the three number combination feels like that door is never going to open you’re never going to get that treasure.
Tim Shurr: But if you have that third number that door swings right open it’s like hey there it is right, real easy.
Tim Shurr: And that’s what this program teaches you it teaches you how your mind works and it gives you all these cool.
Tim Shurr: Little shortcuts or mind hacks you know that will help you to use the power of your mind to create your life by design, so if you go to power mindset program COM all your listeners for this amazing podcast will get a free copy.
David Horsager: love it Thank you so much for that TIM, and thanks for being here today and a couple questions, I want to ask is just you know you and I.
David Horsager: Get the unique opportunity to walk next to some pretty amazing leaders and have some some pretty significant influence in spite of ourselves and.
David Horsager: What, how do you lead yourself i’m always curious about I you know it’s it’s We talk here a lot because we’re on.
David Horsager: Big stages, a lot how am I going to be the same onstage as I am offstage how do I, what are the routines so that I stay having a.
David Horsager: Healthy vibrant marriage and being a good dad and also leading my team well, but what routines do you have to be healthy physically spiritually emotionally mentally or you know with your team what what, what do you have a routine or two you’d share well.
Tim Shurr: I think the biggest secret for all of us as we surround ourselves with good people mm hmm right people who want to make a difference, people who will give us honest feedback people that will put us in check if need be, which happens occasionally right.
Tim Shurr: yeah so.
Tim Shurr: When you surround yourself with good people and good information I spent a lot of time reading a lot of time listening to podcasts a lot of time.
Tim Shurr: on YouTube just listening to videos while i’m usually exercising and it feeds your mind this positive energy if you’re not intentionally.
Tim Shurr: feeding your mind this positive energy then it’s going to feed off, of whatever else is around you and there’s so much fear and insecurity that.
Tim Shurr: So much propaganda all around us, that I don’t want my mind munching on that I want to munching on beliefs that say you’re good you’re worthy you’re already enough you don’t have to prove yourself.
Tim Shurr: You don’t have to even make it about yourself, make it about others, you know go about your day making others feel like they’re the coolest kid in the room.
Tim Shurr: right that you would pick them first on any team, you know lift people up everywhere, you go.
Tim Shurr: And I also you know I one of my favorite books here is on my desk.
Tim Shurr: on it a whole this one of you so it’s called trusted leader eight pillars that drive results because I saw one of your interview questions was what’s one of your favorite books that you’ve been reading lately, you know down my desk and your book with it there, and that.
Tim Shurr: was pretty easy.
David Horsager: I love it Thank you.
Tim Shurr: Yes, so if you haven’t got trusted leader get that one and trusted edge awesome books I love.
Tim Shurr: A man can I love, how you wrote them and how they’re laid out.
Tim Shurr: That makes it feel easy to read, when you’re selling I don’t like the word busy I like the word in demand, so when you’re in demand, you don’t have time to read a bunch of books, so it makes it easy, so thank you for doing that.
David Horsager: So.
Tim Shurr: that’s it has some mentors.
Tim Shurr: i’ve been really lucky.
Tim Shurr: The last year i’ve spent a lot of time with Dennis whately Dr Dennis whately who wrote the psychology of winning and.
Tim Shurr: and spent a lot of he’s 87 years old and we spent a lot of time together and he is like one of the most successful motivational speakers that ever lived he almost kind of started the movement.
Tim Shurr: With conan night and conan kale right no Nightingale conant Earl Nightingale kind of launched his career.
Tim Shurr: And so, and he’s still the last time we talked last week he’s talking about the power of of not making assumptions negative assumptions and assuming the best in others and keeping our ego in check, and how can I bring in someone else’s day you know he’s still at 87.
Tim Shurr: always trying to make himself better and he’s just been a really amazing influence for me this last year.
David Horsager: That was that’s where we got the resource question we got the lead the have mentors what’s one you know one best piece of advice one more like do you have a tag piece of advice you’d say here’s something I would do right now, everybody.
Tim Shurr: yeah I would say that your biggest breakthroughs are hidden in the places you don’t want to go so look at where you’re resisting where you’re putting things off where you feel uncomfortable.
Tim Shurr: And then that’s where you need to go, because when you go in that direction you’re uncovering the belief.
Tim Shurr: That will allow you to make a huge breakthrough in your life, because when you upgrade a belief it literally upgrades the information in your sphere around you, you know everything we’re like we live in this.
Tim Shurr: digital world you know your mind can pay attention to so many different possibilities.
Tim Shurr: And when you upgrade a belief you tune into a new set of information that you hadn’t noticed before and that new information will help you to achieve the goal that you have.
Tim Shurr: faster than how you are probably trying to do it on your own.
Tim Shurr: Right, so when we have prosperity success abundance it’s not something that you collect it’s something that you tune into.
Tim Shurr: And the fastest way to tune into it is find where you resist figure out what the belief is and start to upgrade it and the one belief away book will help you or, if you want faster results reach out to my office and.
Tim Shurr: And we’ll get it done in less than an hour and you’ll find yourself, creating momentum and magic in your life that will blow your mind, no matter how successful you are hmm.
David Horsager: TIM sure Thank you so much, well, I think we answered your your week, we have one more question remember all the show notes trusted leader show.com.
David Horsager: I asked this you might say, it’s Dennis whately but i’m going to ask it again because it’s our final question, and that is it’s a trusted leader show who is a leader, maybe have another one that you trust most trust and why.
Tim Shurr: yeah Troy Hannah he was President and central restaurant products and now he’s President of another company, and when I first got into working with with companies.
Tim Shurr: He taught me things like whatever it is, and you know margins and kpis and.
Tim Shurr: I didn’t know what any of that stuff was right and and he really kind of took me under his wing and showed me what a people centric culture oriented.
Tim Shurr: leader is like he was very transformational he was very transactional but he was very transformational as well.
Tim Shurr: You know he’s very good he started as a sales guy and then worked his way up the ranks and then you know that company almost doubled its profitability in the five years that him and I work together, it was pretty extraordinary and.
Tim Shurr: I just learned so much from him because he would tell me the truth and he would be very focused on the results that we were going to get but he was also open to growing, and you know, one of the coolest things that ever happened.
Tim Shurr: Is I would go sit in his office, and when we first sat down, it was just him and his desk and his paper paperwork right and files he had to go through.
Tim Shurr: You know, a couple of years into it, I went in there, and there was pictures of his family all over the desk.
Tim Shurr: Right, he never showed that side of himself before he had never talked about his kids his wife anything like that.
Tim Shurr: And one of the best comment or compliments I ever received and i’ve had a bunch of them, but he said you didn’t just make us a better company, you made us better people i’m like that’s what Troy Hannah.
David Horsager: That’s fantastic well there has more we could cover but TIM sure, thank you, thank you, thank you for this time together that’s the trusted leader show until next time stay trusted.